This article is a spiritual continuation of the Paul Ekman piece and of the Mindfulness piece. It concludes the mini-series on the inspection of what emotions are and what causes them. This article doesn’t really have any practical Red Pill application, but it is a theory lunchpad for future concepts. Well, let’s get to it.
Here I will present the Constructed Theory of Emotions, a model that originates from Lisa Barrett and discussed on her book, but its roots are much older in Kant, actually.
The first 100 or so pages are good
In short, and contrasting Ekman (in whom emotions are reactions to external events), under this model, emotions are flexible mental concepts which the brain uses to summarise the moment-to-moment experiences. Not unlike an “apple” can mean all these things:
But we still regard the concept of an “apple” as well defined. You know what an apple is, but now apply the same thing to happiness, sadness, etc. And in conclusion, an emotion does not exist as an evolutionary or bodily function, but only as a mental shortcut.
First, we will summarise three results from neuroscience, before we mix some theory of mind philosophy.
The illusion of free will
This is an old result from the 1980s that aims to prove that there is no “free will”, but in reality, it just proves that consciousness is a secondary product of the brain, not the primary initiator.
It goes like this:
The subject is hooked up to a machine to scan the brain (electronic encephalograph – EEG).
He is given a choice, choose a button on left (blue) or right (red).
He is asked to make a choice first and press the button second.
He records the time of his decision, then the time of the action (pressing the bottom).
The timings are compared with the EEG output.
The scheduling action is planned at the pre-motor cortex, (above your ear and to the front). If your right PMC is excited, it controls the left side of the body, and so the subject chooses the left button. If the left PMC is excited, we have the same situation vice versa. Hence, the PMC (either left or right) is gonna get excited at the time of decision and button press. That is the story, so let’s see the results:
What is displayed here is that the PMC is excited, as expected, marked by “intention to act,” but it is also excited before the conscious decision is made. In some variations, up to a whole 10 seconds beforehand. That is called the “gap of free will”, essentially asking the question: “How is the brain active before consciousness has come to the same conclusion?”. Concluding eventually that consciousness is not the thing that drives the brain.
There are variants of this experiment where scientists remotely (with radio waves) excite the subjects’ PMC before the decision. This swayed the subjects’ choice (to the targeted hemisphere) with 80% accuracy.
Commentary
We have now built block number 1: the brain operates below the level of consciousness, or better put, consciousness is a by-product of brain activity and subservient to it rather than the other way around.
Aside: I don’t like that this experiment is tied to “free will” rather than consciousness; there are better philosophical arguments to refute free will, and we don’t need to go to such lengths as studying the brain for it.
Interoception
Interoception essentially means that there are no independent regions in the brain. In particular, some regions associated with “body budget”, i.e., how many resources are expected to be consumed from the body in the following moments, are so interconnected with everything that no decision (i.e., brain activity) can be made independently of them.
Here is the issue visually, these are the regions associated with body budgeting:
In plain English, what we said before means that if you are hungry, let’s say, then your body budget regions are locked in some configuration associated with it. Then any subsequent brain activity cannot (functionally) be independent of you being hungry, as the brain network is already partially defined by it.
The famous example is regarding judges and paroles in the US:
This graph sugarcoats the actual result of the study, which was that the hungrier the judges were getting (before the brakes), the less likely they were to grant paroles.
Commentary
There is nothing new with this result. This is exactly the concept of frames and framing, with the added twist that all thought actually has to go “through the body”. Or that your body itself is a giant framing axis for all your thoughts. Actually so dominant that it trumps all other axes.
Therefore, hunger, physical pain, physical pleasure, level of exercise, how much sunlight you are getting, etc., define your thinking first and in particular more than anything else. A result that actually proves Nietzsche’s obsession with the body, and that everything is physical first before intellectual (and hence all morality is also biological by extension).
The predictive brain
This is the dominant neuroscientific model of the brain in recent times. The idea is that if you take the brain to be fully reactive, then you have multiple contradictions. I won’t get into detail, but here are some visual examples to showcase the point:
The flash-lag effect showcases that the brain predicts the position of objects, so you see the flicking cube move faster.
The brain fills in the image to construct two triangles, without their presence. In neuroscientific terms, your visual neurons fire in the absence of external signal.
All the “fake shadow” illusions work because your brain simulates (predicts) the image holistically in the absence of moment-to-moment feedback. The pure visual feedback would showcase two squares of the same color.
We can go on and on with this, but the bottom line is that there is significant evidence that the brain works as a predictive machine. Your perception right now is a prediction of your brain one moment in the past. The way the brain updates your perception of reality is just by corrections to the predictive model. Not unlike how a YouTube video works, where the data that your computer receives is in regards to pixels that must change color, while if there is no update, the pixel maintains the same color as the previous step.
To illustrate this final point, let’s consider vision. The signal goes from the eyes to thalamus and then to the visual cortex at the back of the head. However, take a look at how many more blocking connections come from the visual cortex to the thalamus:
And since we are on the topic and to tie this back to interoception, see how many more connections come from the body budgeting regions to the visual cortex:
In particular, estimates have it that 90% of vision is not from the eyes. Extend the same concept to all senses, and you have the “predictive brain model”.
Interlude to Philosophy
The final building block is the concept of “categories and concepts” from philosophy. I am not sure the source of the concept, but I am following Barrett’s book here nonetheless.
What we are aiming for is a model of how the brain groups information. A category is meant to correspond to the real world and be everything we might name under the same grouping. For example, a Fiat and a Ferrari are both under the category of car, but of course, physically, they are totally different.
These are both “cars”
What makes a category different from a concept, which itself is also a grouping, is that the concept is abstract, and it is the mental representation of the category in your brain. For example, when I prompt you with “tell me what is a car” maybe you will answer with this:
The concept of “car”
Repeating: category is a grouping in the real world, while concept is the abstract candidate representing the grouping.
Now, this is not all theoretical mumbo jumbo; similar to frames, there is evidence that categories and concepts direct thinking. For example, take the following optical illusion:
If you prime your brain with the “numbers” category (vertical), you see 13. If you prime your brain with the “letters” category (horizontal), then you see B.
The Constructed Theory of Emotion
We now have all the tools to explain the theory.
Connection with Categories and Concepts
We claim that emotions are simply categories. The mental representation we have of them is simply the concept of them. For example, we associate happiness with a smile, but also all the following are acceptable realizations of “happiness”:
cry in happiness
scream in happiness
jump in happiness
etc.
All these fall into category of happiness
The fact that despite the realizations of the category, we maintain a concept of happiness is what causes all the tunnel vision around emotions. The mental representative is strictly too narrow to explain what is happening.
Connection with the Gap of Free Will
However, as you might have already noticed, if the “emotion” is not biologically defined (in opposition to Ekman), then it is conceptually defined and hence a product of consciousness (by definition). Doubly so because it is a category, and hence fully lives fluidly in the realm of consciousness (nobody forces us to call the Fiat and the Ferrari as “cars”; it is a product of reason we do so).
As the gap of free will section already proved, however, anything that is a product of consciousness is actually a product of underlying brain activity, as the faculty of reason sits on top of undefined mental activity below it.
Connection with Interoception
As all brain activity is intertwined with the physical state of the body, when consciousness declares a feeling as “emotion X”, then X is a product of the physical state itself following the law of interoception. Hence, when consciousness declares X to be happiness, it is just the contextual interpretation of the bodily state, or better put, a physiological interpretation in “context”. But then what is “context”? It leads us to…
Connection with the predictive brain
So what is context? What could it be if not your brain’s understanding of the situation, which, as we already established, is a prediction made one moment in the past.
This prediction regulates the body budgeting regions of the brain, which in turn regulate interoception, which in turn regulates consciousness, which finally interprets everything into a grouping that it calls emotion.
And there you have it. This is what makes emotions.
This essay explores one aspect of a larger structure. On its own, it stands, but it is not the whole model.
The book connects these pieces into a single structure: frame, value, power, escalation, calibration — not as advice, but as a theory of how the Game actually works.
If you want the complete system rather than individual essays, start here:
“Only one coffee?”, the counter girl asks after I give my order.
“Yes, because two… two will be too many”, I reply.
Silence follows. She proceeds to do her job mechanically
“You need more points to use a discount”, the counter girl asks after I scanned my loyalty card.
“Ah, you want me to buy more things!”, I reply jokingly.
Silence follows as she stares into the abyss.
Pick Up Overview
These and similarly retarded interactions are the norm in this god-forsaken country. I will analyze in depth my thoughts, but for now, I can confirm, after medium-term time there, I have escaped! I am out! Flight bound back to West!
Korea has been a mixed experience. On the PUA side of things, it was an adventure. The stories are so crazy, they are barely believable. Here are some on the top of my mind:
I dated a girl and her best friend at the same time.
I was hooking up with my landlord (in the most PUA fashion).
I had a “date” on a fuckin bus, then we went straight to the girl’s home (lay).
I had a girl 20 minutes into the date tell me “You are ugly”, followed up with “you are boring and we don’t match”. This was a 2.30 hour lay.
And on the achievement trophy table:
I always had a rotation of 2 girls, sometimes jumping to 3.
Had sex with 3 different girls in the same 24 hour window. (1 new lay)
Had sex with 4 different girls in one calendar week. (2 new lays)
Had 3 near misses in 3 days.
However, as you can already notice, there is a lack of “normal” stories. Boy meets girl and then after dating they fuck: +1. Aside from one girl that took 3 dates to get the lay, all the rest happened within a window of 3 hours, sometimes as low as one. This is not normal seduction, it is outlier seduction….
Note: Dating in Korea is known to be notoriously slow. When I was getting 2 hour lays, some of the girls were in disbelief on how fast things moved. This needs a very, very high level of Game to pull off.
And it is outlier seduction, because in the normal day to day life, this country is a giant shithole, so dysfunctional that is hard to explain to a non-traveler in a way they can understand the culture. Regardless, let’s give it a try.
Pause: I will reiterate this now. This is a pick-up review of the country and the people. The country is assessed on the axis of the pleasantness and openness of making new connections. If you are a die-hard fan of Korea because this country blows the shit out of yours in terms of cost of living and quality of life, so be it: this is a different mentality altogether. I averaged about 1 new date a week and a new lay every 2 weeks to 1 month. The Korean society shows a totally different face once you engage with it like that.
The Emptiness
Understand this: this country rejects your whole being. As a foreigner, you are a non-entity. Travellers fail to see this because the honeymoon phase is so novel with new foods, cheap prices, and weird ass things to see and enjoy. These are legit, Korea is a very nice country for short-term traveling. However, they fail to focus on the elephant in the room.
Koreans don’t speak to you. At all. If you try to interact with them, they will throw some Korean to you, feel satisfied they “did” their job, and then leave. You think I am joking, but this is exactly the “face” culture at work. It looked like they tried, but really, they didn’t. They won’t try to use broken English, a translation app, or sign language; to them, you are just a nuisance. This behaviour had driven me to such a frenzy, many a time, I literally took out my phone, wrote insults into Papago (the translation app), and shoved it into their face.
I will delve more into this later on, but for the TLDR, keep the following in mind. Korean banality is at extreme levels. People just walk around with empty eyes, going through life on autopilot – a form of nihilism that would be envious to Russians. Maybe, indeed, they were Samsung cyborgs all along.
Men, and especially so women, have no real hobbies, no real curiosity of the world, no true ambition (that is not status seeking), and most of all, they have zero interest to anything that is non-Korean [And as I will explain later, whatever is Korea, is so fake, constructed and a product of post civil war society (if not the last 30 years since their last dictatorship) that is hard to see the picture without pulling your hair].
This translates into dating beautifully. You get a slob of a girl sitting opposite you, who won’t, and more accurately cannot carry her own weight of conversation. Additionally, she has no real character, speaks mostly on cliches, and has so little curiosity about what you say, that navigating the date is a landmine field on its own.
Many a time, they would just decide that the simple act of speaking English is hard and lose all interest mid-date. Some others, they would try to make an effort and participate, but they would operate on such slow pace that they might randomly laugh at a joke you made 2 minutes ago.
All in all, dating Koreans was about finding one, for whatever reason, who happens to be open to you and like you. It is up to chance whether she decides to pick you or not. Leading is nigh impossible, as she will operate at her own pace and speed, and you might as well be a ghost if you try to stir the conversation into any topics she just doesn’t happen to be interested in. It felt that beyond looks, how much of the value the girl would get to absorb was based solely on her and not on me. It was essentially “being chosen” with all the passivity that comes with it. It was reducing the art of pick-up into a Bingo slot machine.
You might say that this is only my experience as non-Korean speaker. And I would agree to an extent, but from the couples I observed, the vast, vast majority to me seemed mindless drones that were dating for the simple purpose of doing things that are “cute” or “on trend”. There was a small but significant subsection where the girl was literally bullying the guy to get any reaction or dominance out of him. And there was a small minority, maybe 1 or 2 couples a day, that had a really great dynamic between them. Something that might resemble good Daygame sets – in all honesty, kudos on them, that is hard to achieve organically. [And that is 2 more couples than what you normally see in the West btw – so hold your horses back home].
Cool, you might therefore say: at least the girls are hot, and this is largely true. They have some of the hottest girls in Asia, if not the World. Blessed on the upper and lower departments, rampant facial surgery and intense beauty treatments make for admirable girls.
However… the emptiness! Even when it comes to sex, the baggage we discussed earlier doesn’t go away. You have a beast in the shape of a human, who barely knows how to show erotic affection, that is screaming and squeaking while you fuck her. Yes, autistic self-obsession can even ruin sex.
And it gets even worse. They give half-assed blowjobs, usually with teeth (if they give at all). And just to rub it in, they, and I am no kidding here, all want seconds or even more. If you become tired, some of them literally start rubbing their pussy. Take the hotness aside, and you have a first-class Neanderthal next to you.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining. I would love this normally. But when every sexual encounter is just deja vu, it feels just like masturbating with a girl rather than your hand. When sex lacks the femininity to power it all, it really is only the act that remains. This is what I am alluding to here. For the first time, I got to experience sex for the act of sex. There is something innate, maybe even metaphysical, that gives girls their warmth and appeal.
It also gets to show that a girl is more than a sexy appeal. Education really matters, and this is what was lacking here. Of course, when I refer to education, I don’t mean list 10 facts about X. I mean manners, social aptitude, and how to be able to interact with others. “Woman, left on its own, devolves into a smelly beast” [Bronze age pervert], and this is at work here. Korean girls living at the spearhead of feminism and consumerism just didn’t bother to learn anything. Hence, all this freedom amounted to making breathing AI dolls instead of enriching them.
The Korean Dating Market
It begs the question therefore, how much of an outlier I was getting as a foreigner (or just being me, with my personality and SMV) compared to what the true dating market is for Korean men. Is the average Korean experiencing a totally different world than the one I described?
Let’s try to make a two piece argument on this. I will make the case now that the dating market cannot be the opposite to what I describe: it can be less intense, but there is no hidden South Mediterranean culture unobserved by foreigners.
To prove this point, I will speak with anecdotes (of course), but on the one hand, what I saw on the street is that Koreans themselves were getting the cold shoulder as well. They were experiencing the same phenomena I described. The caveat is that they also had less social expectations than I. It bears no secret that I was in the company of mostly Korean women, but you would be surprised by their social risk aversion. Many a time I asked them to translate for me, and I flat out got the “you cannot just say/ask/do this in Korea”. I also got to learn about their social groups and especially university clubs: just a bunch of introverts thrown together that refuse to interact with each other for meetings on end.
The real picture, therefore, has on some level to represent what I described. And here comes the second part of my argument: as long as we are thinking like this, then the situation is fucked. I might got 100% fuck-you points as a foreigner, but if the Koreans get even 10% of what I got… then we are already on damage control, because fundamentally this is not a situation of thriving, it is a situation of making due tooth and nail.
A criticism to the digital nomad culture
I stand by the writing above. And as you can already see where this is going, I thus ask the question: the run-of-the-mill French/British/American guy who lives long term in Korea (and presumably Japan) under these social conditions… something has to be wrong with him. People, or at least proactive people, won’t just take it on the chin and say “that is just life”. I lived like this for months and months in Korea. It is a state of meditation where the world around you is not real: you can see images and people, but you can only interact in a scripted manner with it.
But eventually it gets to you. Maintaining your identity and objective value measurements (from abroad) starts to require tremendous inner effort. Let your concentration wander, even for a second, and your personality might dissolve into a faceless mass of Korean society. To paraphrase Nietzsche: “We built beautiful parks, malls, and clean streets. We found happiness, they say – and then, they blink.”
Daygame
Let us turn to Daygame specifically. I will not sugarcoat it. I got one lucky lay out of it, and aside from 4 more dates… I failed to get anything in more than 100 sets. I saw most success in nightgame and some from apps (3 lays, however, used sparingly). The former screened for status, as it is the only thing their pea of a brain registers, and the latter screens from travelled Koreans who are equally isolated as you.
Note that from nightgame, I actually left every night out with a girl, and the 3 lays from apps come from a total of 2 weeks using them. The alternatives to Daygame were indeed efficient.
The majority of them never even stopped. And I am not only talking about the risky sets, I am talking about all sets. You would see extreme behaviour on the streets. Non-verbals cranked to 11. Hip sway, aimless walking and unapologetic eye-fuck staring. Then you would run to her, and not only you would get rejected, you would get humbled.
Aside: the Korean eye contact trick. This country approaches eye contact weirldly. Girls are very, very sensitive to it. Just stare at the girl. The first 3 seconds she will ignore you, the next 3 she will stare back, then she will give you amazing non-verbals.
They would walk over you. Be genuinely insulted you dared try to talk to them (note that this is even before the compliment, this is from the “hi”). And I even had girls literally scream 3 times [Note: nothing to worry here, if she screams because you said “excuse me” from 2 meters of distance away, that is on her for being a degen, not on you]. But who am I to talk about it? I had many more people scream because I asked them if they stood in line to pay at the counter, the society is just that socially retarded.
Go through this for any significant amount of time, and your inner game will get crushed. After a while, I was genuinely wondering how had I even banged 9 of them. There would be the oddball good set here and there, but it would be one single demographic, the Korean girl who had worked or studied abroad (usually in the US or Australia). And that was the single objective advantage of online game in Korea over Daygame. The girls would auto-filter themselves out, so the search costs would significantly be reduced. [But make no mistake, even my limited success in Daygame was averaging a point hotter than online game].
In short, Daygame in Korea is not bad; it is apocalyptic. It can only mirror Mr. White’s (an old daygamer) review of Japan. [What happened to your blog nowadays, Mr. White !?] He called this type of response “ghost blowout”. But in contrast to his experience, where in Japan cheating is acceptable as long as it is not caught, in Korea, you would just get bodied from the get-go.
Even the dirtiest of Korean sluts would stay loyal once they are in a “relationship”; it carries a different weight. That is actually a thing to be admired of them, so credit where it is due.
I never claimed to be a Don Juan in looks, but nowhere else in the world I ever had such bad reactions trying to engage with people. One time, I was at Times Square mall, in Yangdeopo, and one street behind the mall, there is a red light district conveniently placed. Out of curiosity, I went to have a look. The girls were mostly outside their boxes, trying to hustle Korean grandpas for a fuck.
I am pointing out the fact that they were calling out to fat, ugly, salary men and grandpas who needed a stick to walk properly. Because… the moment I was within a 5-meter radius of her box, they would start to hiss at me, shouting “shhhh, xsss” and waving me to go away with their heads.
Welp, if God was ever to give me a signal… getting rejected by a whore (actually 90% of them) might as well be it.
Aside from the lucky lay, that she happened to have lived abroad extensively, all the other 4 dates I had from Daygame died out within the first hour. All of them because the girl gave up on English. One of them had actually prepared English notes specifically for the date, but decided otherwise when she had to use this weird language of English.
The last part is why, in contrast, nightgame and online game were more efficient. The majority of Daygame attrition was being burned in finding girls open to speaking in English. Online naturally filters them out, and in the club, status plays a much more central role than verbals.
Logistics – Daygame
Despite all this, if you are hotheaded and want to Daygame, here is my intel.
Regarding the weather. Before March, the temperatures are well below zero. Sometimes all the way to -10 Celsius in the evening. After May, the temperature goes into the 20s, but as Seoul is a concrete jungle, it feels way too hot. So the sweet spot is March to May.
Regarding locations: Jamsil (Lotte tower), COEX mall (Samseong station), Gangnam route (between Gangnam station and the next few stations in vertical line), Seongsu (alternate/hip area), Myeong-dong (tourist area), and Hongdae (2 universities there, one of which is Yonsei) are your best bets.
Maybe you can make it work around Dongdaemun, but the area feels like a ghetto. Also, going down from Gwangwamun into Jogno seems like a viable plan, but be warned, the sewage system of Korea is notoriously close to the ground, and that area smells particularly bad. You will get isolated gusts of something that can only be described as biological warfare.
Out of all these areas the level of English felt the best in Hongdae, but mind you it is isolated 40 minutes away from everything else. All other areas are within 20 minutes of each other. Seongsu was second, for the random alternative girl. Myeng-dong wasn’t bad, but only for the Chinese/Japanese tourists. In every other area I tried, I got way too much pushback regarding English.
Logistics – Nightgame
Gangnam (including Rodeo street) felt unworkable. Overtly transactional from the side of the girls, weirdly effective for Koreans who had money to spend (but I don’t know if they actually fucked the girls). But watching the entire nightlife devolve into something resembling open prostitution felt weird. Anyway, if you open a bottle and get a big table (and speak Korean), girls seem to flock to you. In Gangnam, I achieved absolutely nothing of note. I failed to even get any set going.
Itaewon felt much more workable, especially with foreigners. Foreigners in general felt better quality than your average expat, but maybe it is the contrast (to Koreans) speaking. As I explained in my semi-guide for nightgame, work the club, not the girls.
In Itaewon, foreigners are your first line of attack, and then the Koreans who speak English and are willing to engage with you might join your group. If you randomly open sets, the situation of the street will repeat in the club. There was not a single night out I left without a girl (of varying quality), and it is quite easy to get a kiss, usually averaging 3-4 per night.
Hongdae is the third club area, but I never visited. They also have age and nationality restrictions, so keep that in mind. Even in Itaewon, there are Korean-only clubs.
This concludes my PUA guide to Seoul, the remaining is me trying to put some background to my claims above. Essentially, still shitting on Korea… but with arguments!
Koreans are Utterly Useless
You might read the above and the bad reactions of the girls feel personal or even racist. That is not the truth. The issue is societal and systemic, and it starts from the fact that these people are allowed to be useless slobs in the first place. I will first make some observations on the men.
Korean men?
Korean men have disappeared. It is a shock to walk around the street, and the ratio being consistently 70-80% women. Just where are the men?
I did visit some internet cafes – and for sure they were full of men -, but this is not a simple issue, because we are not discussing whether men are video game addicts or hikikomori. We are discussing the total exclusion of men from day-to-day public life.
So where are the men? Are they all at work, army service (ridiculous 18 months)? Possibly. But the only demographics on the street are young girls and grandmas. Every space has been estrogenized. You can see it in people’s eyes, ready to explode from status competition and indirect aggression. In the metro, people will just whale on others to go through. Not once did I see people just lightly tap others and say “excuse me”.
I won’t do a full analysis of this; any half Red Pill educated person would be able to associate the issue of every space being utterly dominated by women with its social after-effects. I am strongly pointing out the observation.
Side note: Regardless, I was truly surprised at how well their men were able to work in groups and cooperate (mostly by following rules). This is a thing of note.
Back to the main topic. Never listen to people complaining that work in Korea is grueling, tiresome, and stressful. They indeed have a culture of hurrying up, lack of personal boundaries, etc., but never associate this with competence.
The majority of workers would pretend to work hard, while most of the time, just sitting on their phones. When you would ask them a question or for assistance, they would freeze and not know how to answer. You could just observe them and spot the utter incompetence in everything. I remember going to a phone store, and the full-time worker – who had an office and a computer – not only doesn’t know how to assist you, but is not allowed to help you and is meant to refer you to the call center instead.
In short, it is truly miraculous that Korea even functions at all. All the workers are unmotivated, don’t have initiative, imagination, or any sense of duty to their work. Somehow, the machine keeps running. There you have it, when you think of it as a capitalist hellhole, it is not the system that fails, it is the attitude of the people.
Aside: It is truly an interesting observation that this country can run so well. Their services and infrastructure really is beyond anything we have in the West. However, and at the same time, on the individual level, the picture is as I describe it.
I will keep going: everything is just appearances. Many times, when I would ask something in English, the worker would reply in Korean, then attempt to leave because he was “seen” doing his job (i.e., replying). Did it matter whether he actually did his job (i.e., the outcome), and actually helping the customer? No. Fuck that.
That is exactly the mentality at hand: be seen, not do. That is why you have people sitting at their shop counter for hours on end, when it is obvious that such a place can never make any money, or the worker is not needed. I specifically remember the central station in Bushan: miles and miles of underground shops, all selling the same Chinese stuff. It is impossible that 90% of them can turn a profit; however, they were all operating with employees.
It goes even further. You have scores and scores of old people that have nothing to do all day. So they work to beautify the city. You could see 3 people holding a screen for 1 person to blow leaves. You would see people tasked to walk around and pick the weeds from the side of the road. You would see people walking around tasked to open and close their public umbrellas (for the sun, under the traffic lights). Utterly useless work if you ask me. Better than paying welfare for sure if that is your only alternative, but name it for what it is: covert welfare.
Now, beautifying the city is an important task, and I did enjoy the clean, catered spaces. The issue comes at hand when this type of demographic dominates public life so much. A sterilizing and passive demographic. The issue comes when your active and entrepreneurial demographic is hidden on the sidelines. This is the dividing line between reading what I said in a positive or negative tone. What I am getting at, is to paint this picture: that you have an entire society, presumably well educated, but aside from being able to function in the bureaucratic state, these people are unimaginative, and totally useless for every other task.
Some Korean History
Well, I am totally unqualified to speak of their history, but I can make educated guesses, mostly from their art. Because the old question still remains, what made their society covertly defective?
Well, let’s take a look, what did ancient Koreans leave to us?
This was a nation so stubborn about life in the village and life in nature that we barely have any paintings from them of big cities or other monumental architecture. Mind you, these paintings are dated when Europeans were sailing the world and discovering America. They even have museums depicting all their customs and traditions. Their culture was close-minded (long-standing traditions), defensive to intervention, and most importantly, total. Everything from birth to death was regulated by celebration and custom.
The last 100 years, they have swapped from Japanese occupation, to a civil war that is barely believable… I mean, come on, were these guys ready to fight against communism? I don’t know the full history, but I believe whatever foreign meddling went on to initiate the war, it was significant.
People ready to risk their lives on ideological grounds
To a succession of dictatorships and night curfews (until late into the 1980s), to the final modern Seoul that looks like this:
Or better put, you took your Korean out of his small carefree life in the rice paddy and put him into the rat cage that is modern Seoul. The modern mega-city life of Seoul is opposite to all life that took place in Korea before that.
Hence, it is my personal opinion that modern Korean Culture is an utter fiction, a patchwork, placed to mask the total emptiness of soul. There is no real Korean culture, because what can be named Korean culture has never left the small town. All the traditions and closed-mindedness stem from there. Read here for the implications of what I am describing.
Korean work operates on a near feudal state (incompetent workers, unrespectful employers) because these people never developed the capacity to cooperate with strangers on equal footing: hence, hierarchy. Hence, closed-mindedness. Hence, anti-social behaviour.
This essay explores one aspect of a larger structure. On its own, it stands, but it is not the whole model.
The book connects these pieces into a single structure: frame, value, power, escalation, calibration — not as advice, but as a theory of how the Game actually works.
If you want the complete system rather than individual essays, start here:
I have been on a relative hiatus. I am experiencing a small writing fatigue. Readers rest assured, while on my break I made a backlog of topics I want to explore. Specifically the question on how inner psychology changes and develops on the Daygame journey. Stay tuned for future articles!
This short post owns homage to Dostoyevsky, as I am typing this after reading his novel “Notes from Underground”. This novel should be of particular interest to Daygamers, as it explores in detail a psychographic profile very dear to our hearts… the Gamma !
The first part of the novel is a 30 page philosophical exhortation, while reading it, one agrees with the pillars of “gamma philosophy”. The writing is rational and deals with real problems.
However… on the second part of the novel, Dostoyevsky pulls off the gloves and holds no punches. He showcases the life of the man who wrote those first 30 pages as a disgusting and pathetic creature. Duplicitous with high morality that secretly, not even he upholds to… in short, Gamma. All the earlier approving nods are out of the window and stomach turning behaviour takes place in all its glory.
Well, I am no better writer than the man himself, so I leave readers with this book recommendation. It explores the topic in quite detail in aspects of work, love, friends and dealing with subordinates.
This essay explores one aspect of a larger structure. On its own, it stands, but it is not the whole model.
The book connects these pieces into a single structure: frame, value, power, escalation, calibration — not as advice, but as a theory of how the Game actually works.
If you want the complete system rather than individual essays, start here:
Lately, I have been exiled to Daygame Prison. Things are so bad over here, with language and culture barriers, that make Daygame utterly and totally useless. I will write more on this when time comes (and I can reveal the location), but for the last month, I have been exploring the depths of Nightgame, as the necessary alternative.
I will be honest, I have been enjoying my time quite a bit. If it was not for my distaste of alcohol and loud environments, I could see myself doing more of it. Things in nightgame are for sure more blatant (towards the degenerate side), and for the first time, I am seeing with cold, clinical eyes the “other side” of the reality that Manosphere describes. From my 2 new lays in the last month, one was in a committed relationship of 3 years and the other… read on!
The Alpha and the Betas
There come rare moments in Game, where the world smiles at you, gives you a pat on the back, and says “good job, you made it“. Here is the high-level overview of the lay before we jump into the details.
I am on a night out with a girl friend of mine. She can be described as a super-pivot, and unapologetically, I have used her slutiness of sexy dancing and grinding to attract attention of other girls. As the night progresses, we meet Jasmine, she is out with her friend (a gay guy) and another guy, whom I learn she had already kissed for the evening. I open them and we become friends.
Eventually, my own friend bails around 2am, and I am stuck in the club area until 7am (when the metro opens) all by myself. The gay guy becomes disappointed as this country is quite anti-gay and bails too soon after. I have to make something out of nothing, so I return to Jasmine and her friend as my makeshift “social base of operations”.
After a while we swap clubs, Jasmine’s guy gets tired and bails for the night. Soon enough, Jasmine finds another guy who is solo dancing and quickly makes out with him. At some time around 4am, another guy comes up to Jasmine when the dancer was out on a smoke break, they make out and they exchange numbers. Dancer guy returns, and they keep their usual degen grinding and kissing. All night, I have barely interacted with Jasmine. She has come to dance with me and grind with me a few times. I played on for show and then I returned her to her dancer guy.
The night progresses, 7am comes, I just tap on Jasmine’s shoulder and tell her “metro is opening soon, let’s go“. She abandons the dancer guy and comes with me. Five minutes of chit chat outside the metro station nets me a kiss close. Then I tell her I will take her home with me, after some pre-LMR negotiating, we eventually go to her place. Clothes off, no (actual) LMR, +1.
Therefore, I am posing this question. What makes a girl, who kissed 3 guys in the course of the night, abandon them, have sex with me, who was basically ignoring her 99% of the time, and just to rub it in, actively encouraged her to go kiss other guys?
The cherry on top comes when she mockingly showed me 2 of the other 3 guys texting her on the way home. They were wishing her to “arrive home safely” and that “they had an awesome night and hope to see her again” – all the while I was about to fuck their girl.
The Nature of Night
As a prelude to the following, I am laying down my early thoughts on nightgame. I truly believe that 99% of signalling in nightgame is false. Not just “oops mistake, I kissed a guy I don’t like”, false in the sense “I am knowingly grinding and kissing a guy, that I actively don’t like“.
Why girls are doing that? The fuck I know, but out of all couples, pick up attempts, etc., that I saw in the night, the majority of them didn’t feel genuine. I am betting money that no sex actually took place.
The second axis of nightgame is status. My God, the amount of fronting, or “just doing things for show”, and to stick it to others, is so pronounced that I can hardly explain it.
Couples would come to the club to sexy dance in the middle of the stage. Why would a guy willingly bring his girl to move her ass in the middle of the club?… I don’t know, maybe he does. But I mostly feel this is monkey brain seeking validation: “look what I am fucking, bro!”
He gets nothing out of it, as he cannot capitalize on pre-selection. She gets some slutty attention from other guys, but she has no real intention of jumping other guys either. Hence, is it some outsourced sexual urge (that they each want to fuck others), and can only satisfy by the substitute of club attention? Again, I don’t know. But it happens, and it happens a lot.
Therefore, the reality of nightlife is a supercharged environment of superficial status jockeying. Nothing, if ever, of any significance, stickiness and meaning is achieved. Appearance before substance to the highest degree. Krauser had put it very nicely: “it doesn’t feel that on the street we are further away than the club in terms of fucking the girl“.
Adaptation
Well then, should we all turn nihilists, or should we all abandon the club and turn into Daygame? I am devoting a whole section, because apparently this old tenet of Game has been lost in the modern pussified generation: Life can give you shit, and it is your job to make things out of it.
It is not the girl, not the club, not human nature. It is on you to figure out a way to pork the girl. Nobody will help you with it, get over it. Here are my personal adaptations to my observations above.
Be the value giver
After fronting and superficiality, what sticks? Value. That is the one true axis of judging behaviour. Incentives and rewards. People can see past fronting, and where people are truly judged is based on exactly what they provide for the tribe.
There is only one signal: sex
If the majority of behaviour is false flag, then judge behaviour only in terms of sex. It doesn’t matter who smiles at you; it only matters if she jumps you. And the same is true of her vs others, if she will jump you (i.e., you are the highest value guy available), then her behaviour vs others is just an act – let her do whatever. Even suck them off if she wants, it doesn’t matter (ok, don’t go that far, dump her if she really does that). Penis in vagina is the only metric.
What really happened
Let us repeat the story in context. When we met Jasmine, my pivot was supercharging my value by showing sexual approval. When we first met them, I also met an EE girl, whom I kissed after two minutes. After that, we went for a smoke break with the gay, and I also jokingly pretended to be gay. Sadly, the homo took it personally, and soon enough, tanked all my chances with that girl.
Back to the main group, my friend and the gay bail, so I lead the other two to the second club. My entire purpose in the second club was building our tribe and making sure everyone was having fun. I was pulling people left and right and introducing them to my friends. Then I was using my new friends to get new people in.
I was “saving” girls when guys they didn’t like were hitting on them. Then I was passing them on to guys they liked (which was obvious if you can read subcomms). After 1 hour, our “group” was half the club itself.
In that entire time I was building that, I personally hit on exactly 0 girls. My sole purpose was providing value and making the night fun for everyone. Girls would come to me, I would entertain them for a bit and then pass them around to someone else. Think about it: give a loser a hot girl to dance with, and he is your friend for life.
Jasmine herself was coming to dance on me, but after like a minute, I was just turning my back on her. All this made my value in the club stratospheric. That was the true reason I could just tap her shoulder and say “let’s go home”.
Jasmine
Remember the golden rule I outlined earlier: the only thing that matters is sex, all other signalling is false. Let’s reconsider Jasmine’s behaviour under this light.
All 3 guys who kissed her were Betas. Some were actually quite good-looking, but no match for what I was bringing to the table. Hence, to my eyes, Jasmine was a done deal from moment one. I just had to let her enjoy the night and provide subtle hints, just enough for her to stick around.
I knew the other guys were Betas because when she was coming to dance with me, it was partly a “save me” from that guy. Sorry, lady, you get your one minute of dancing, then give me your hand, back you go to your guy!
Just 10 minutes before the metro opened, I told her straight up: “you don’t actually like that guy (pointing at the dancer), it is so funny”. And that was all she wrote, done deal, game over. The rest was handling logistics; the lay was on the bag.
This essay explores one aspect of a larger structure. On its own, it stands, but it is not the whole model.
The book connects these pieces into a single structure: frame, value, power, escalation, calibration — not as advice, but as a theory of how the Game actually works.
If you want the complete system rather than individual essays, start here:
The manosphere has blessed the world with invaluable knowledge. I truly believe that there are men whose lives have been saved from total ruin, simply by following and understanding Red Pill basics.
However… this does not mean that there are not versions of Red Pill advertised that totally miss the mark. They aim to spread confusion rather than clarity, the same way modern media propagates establishment misinformation. Similarly to how social media campaigns are decided in small rooms from so-called “PR consultants”, so is your daily manosphere content decided by the same guys.
The main detection tool to distinguish gems from chuff is answering the following question: Is this advice aimed at increasing my agency? If it is not, it is usually there to confuse you. The founding block of the manosphere is precisely male agency.
Having said that, let us address some common myths that are thrown around nowdays.
The dating market is harder (Supply side)
No, no, and no. A million times no. The dating market, as a market in the economic sense, has never been better than it is today. Lower your Ego and rationally consider the following:
Nearly every fertile young girl is unmarried – Never have been in the past. Young girls don’t leave the market (supply is maximal).
The concentration of people in megacities has made search costs as low as possible. In terms of meeting girls, the modern male has potential never before imagined.
Adding to the above, we have ease of travelling, instant communication, and if you are willing to go that route, dating apps.
Therefore, purely in terms of Supply, the market for hot, young women has never been better in the history of the human race. Girls never leave the market, are concentrated in one place, and it is easier to communicate with them.
You disagree? Speak with your grandfather. His village had 50 hot young girls, and by the time he was an adult, 30 of them had already been married. Compared to your ancestors, you are visiting a modern supermarket, while they had access to a raided convenience store.
However… you still want to protest, the market is doomed because of male competition… well let’s see.
The dating market is harder (Demand)
Well, you protest that males are taller than ever, richer than ever, and… more of them in pure numbers than ever. We have well documented 3rd world (primarily male) invasions to modern nations that make the average city a low value cockfest.
Well, it is true by purely mathematical and statistical accounts. The demand for sex from males matches and possibly exceeds the supply of girls. But you are forgetting the simple biological fact: Betas will always be Beta.
In the eyes of the girl, the Beta is an imp, a donkey, a beast of burden. And more importantly, an eunuch. There is a whole Red Pill literature supporting this with examples aplenty. In the eyes of the girl, the Beta male is a non-human. That is why they express contempt and unimaginable cruelty at them (have you seen divorce laws?).
Therefore, even if your city has a male-to-female ratio of 99:1, in reality, you are competing against other Alphas and Naturals. Betas will get the scraps regardless.
Don’t confuse pure numbers with real “volume” of competition. That competition is a Potemkin village. You always have been and always will be competing with relatively few other sex worthy men. And those men are always rare.
If you are not getting any sex, it is because you are in the wrong box, not due to competition.
So why is it so hard?
Have you seen the job market lately? Where the rallying cry of the whole industry is “over 100 applicants per job!”, you are not getting a job due to competition! Well… let me tell you, as the job argument is horseshit, so is the dating equivalent.
Let’s start with the job market. The reason you are not getting a job is because there are no jobs. Period. If there were jobs, those 100 applicants would be assigned to jobs, even if not immediately, maybe within a short period of time. But the reason they are not assigned into jobs, is because there are no jobs, not because there are 100 applicants.
Therefore, if your argument is that there is not enough sex to go around. It is because there is no sex happening. Not because there are more dicks in the modern world.
And now we arrive at the root cause of evil: not the market, not the supply of dicks, not the supply of pussy. Instead, simply that there is no sex happening in general. So why is there no sex happening:
Atomization
Feminism
Anti-male laws
Lifestyle of slavery (better put systematic suppression of agency)
The system isolates you, makes you overworked, and makes the women hysterical with fantasies of brutality and hatred. That is why there is no sex, because there are no connections between men and women being established. Because those connections are inherently becoming more and more impossible to establish, either via systemic pressure or ideological divergence.
But the mother of all causes is…
Sex is initiated from the erect phallus, not the pussy
If you are any familiar with Red Pill literature, it should be clear that eggs are expensive and sperm is cheap. Women don’t need sex as much as men do. Even genetically in humans this is supported: 14-30% of men reproduced vs 80% of women, ever.
Nature experiments and discards men like there is no tomorrow. If human male was a standalone species, it is facing the worst evolutionary pressure in the entire animal kingdom. Primarily induced by other humans, as homo sapiens himself is an apex predator.
The whole point is that if women are asked the question to fuck or not fuck, they won’t fuck. Therefore, when the male becomes passive, loses his entrepreneurial power to combine resources with his friends and make things work, then… only women are left to choose when sex happens, and the entire decision falls on their shoulders.
And as we already said, when women choose, they won’t fuck. They will just milk men for attention and resources (either directly or indirectly via the state).
I have seen (and had sex with) girls, that if you judged them by their behaviour, you would had said that they are complete sluts. They talk about dick, actively think about it, hit on men, etc. Well, even after clubbing with such women long term, do you know how many guys they fucked? … the best one was 2, over the course of a full year. And that was a girl who would be clubbing solo until 8am, after the rest of the group left.
Drill this into your head: sex needs male leadership. From meet, to escalation, to bedroom. Leave it to the girls, and no matter what they say, they won’t fuck – sex just won’t happen.
On the other hand, if males bonded, initiated festivals, parties, and showcased true male competence. The women would relax and be led into intimacy. The Dionysian orgies of antiquity are not what we see in modern clubs. Because ancient Greeks had what you don’t: manly agency and spirit. That is why the 4 reasons stated in the previous section sting so much. Because they take male agency away.
And with this out of the way, drill the following into your mind.
Women’s competition is not sexual
If you had a pussy, you would understand that you could sexually access any totem pole in a 100km vicinity. Even a 6 can jump a male 9 with very little effort. Hence, their competition is not sexual, it is not to grab men. They have undisputed free rein. Their competition is against other girls for a purely materialistic and pervertedly status seeking goal.
You protest and claim: that even then, women are sexually competing, but they do so for connection and relationship exclusivity. Bollox I say, because what is the purpose of a “relationship” than to parade the man in front of her friends and show them how good of a catch she got. She could very easily get emotional stability and safety nets from her own female social groups. She doesn’t need a man who barely understands what being a girl is.
All female competition exists for the simple reason of sticking it to other girls. Square and simple. It is not there to access high value men or resources. Take Korea, for example, the place with the most fierce female competition on planet earth: 1 out of 3 women has done facial surgery, and the spending for luxury and fashion is through the roof. If this is not “female competition”, I don’t know what it is.
So what are these girls competing for? Have you seen Korean men, and their pussified physique and mentality? Nearly all Korean girls I have dated have told me straight: Korean men are very kind and available, but so boring! [because they call me selfish in contrast].
Regardless, let’s give the benefit of the doubt and assume that there are hidden K-pop stars in the building corners that are monopolizing all sex. Girls, therefore, are competing for this hidden, angel face, Asian sex-ninja. The following numbers are from 2020, presumably better than now:
Mean age of first sexual encounter: 22
Percentage that had engaged in casual sex: 12% (up to 14% for a 95% Confidence Interval)
Sexlessness in the past year: 43% of women and 36% of men reported no sex in 2020-2021
You can go on with these; we all know the situation is bad. But my point is, if the competition is so fierce, then where the hell is the sex! Where is the horny little Asian man?
Because that is the whole point, female competition is not about sex! The idea is smoke and mirrors. Female competition is about attention, which originates from pettiness to stick it to other girls. And if you take it too seriously, the whole society will end up going to shit.
This essay explores one aspect of a larger structure. On its own, it stands, but it is not the whole model.
The book connects these pieces into a single structure: frame, value, power, escalation, calibration — not as advice, but as a theory of how the Game actually works.
If you want the complete system rather than individual essays, start here:
Two concepts that should be easy enough to understand, screening and filtering, have sadly led to such wrong conclusions that, where they aimed to provide clarity, have actually produced more confusion. The concepts themselves, on one hand, have to do with awareness of your own actions and what they entail, while on the other hand, they have to do with the randomness of cold approaching.
In this article, I aim to define things properly and trace them to their natural conclusion.
The Basic Theory of Seduction
Well, young buck, I will have you sit at a bench in a crowded area, and I want you to count me how many of the young ladies you would ideally want to have sex with. All chances, if she is a 6 and above, you would happily plug her, given the opportunity was there. Of course, preference would be for the hotter ones, but the bar for just sex would be low.
Now, lets us consider the dual side of this argument. From among the population of girls that you would like to bone, how many of them would be willing to be boned by you. Chances are, no matter who you are (model, superstar, president), you are open to many more girls than girls are open to you. This is called female choosiness; it has an evolutionary role (pregnancy is costly), and it is a fact of life. Practically, this gap is so large that I wouldn’t be surprised if the ratios are 1000:1 (i.e., for every 1000 girls a male wants to bang, only 1 would be open to them).
Disclaimer: this is over the entire population.
Disclaimer2: Although looks are important, the reality of this ratio shows that beyond a certain level, the futility of looksmaxxing. So what.. you expend all this effort to improve your looks, and the ratio goes up to 950:1? And this practically achieves what, a small ego boost?
And even then… it spirals further. Some of them would be willing to bang you only if you have X and Y characteristics, which you might not have after you met them. Some others might be willing to bang you after 5 dates, which you might not have the patience for it. Some others might be willing to bang you, but might not be available now (work, boyfriend, logistics). Some others might only be willing to bang you when they are at the correct time of the monthly cycle.
The bottom line is, even with calibration, the majority of the girls you will open will be No girls. And that makes the need for a discriminatory tool.
Filtering and Screening: the Toolkit to Reduce Search Costs
We are ready now to define our two terms precisely. They both have to do with how and when we decide that a girl is either a No girl, or has a low chance to be converted into a lay.
Filtering:a preplanned behavioural trait that makes uninterested girls unwilling to engage further.
Screening: An active choice to stop exerting effort for a girl who is possibly unwilling to engage further.
The core essence of the concepts sounds the same, but different disciplines of Game engage with them differently. For example, in direct Daygame, the street stop and the compliment are the filters themselves. Only the girls who accept the bold initial interest would be willing to stay in the interaction further. On the other hand, a social circle player who organises a big party, inevitably is going to invite No girls, after meeting and interacting with them, he will have to actively screen them out.
Both of the versions of the discriminatory tool are carrying inaccuracy risks:
A filter might be too wide. Maybe some Yes and Maybe girls are going to disengage. Hence, the risk is false negative. [Albeit, the more a girl leans towards Yes, the less likely she is to be filtered out].
A screening decision might be inaccurate. In that case, the player might be lured to invest time and effort into a girl who has no real sexual interest in him. Hence, the risk is false positive. [Harder to make a screening decision, the more social value the girl sees in associating with you].
Theory vs practice
In practice, you will get to use both tools. It is not an either/or decision, nor can all of the discriminating decisions be implemented into a model; you will have to actively implement infield and adjust in real time.
In their idolised versions, filters should be on the looser side: filtering out the majority of the No girls and letting the majority of the Yes and Maybe’s in.
Screening decisions should ideally come from your own inner core: “Is the juice worth the squeeze?”. Now, being able to answer this properly without drifting into celibacy is a delicate act. Hence, I will give you a heuristic: out of your current or potential options, is she the best one? If so, keep engaging with her. That means, only screen a girl out when you realistically can do better infield. As you develop your character more, you can tighten this up.
Congruency and Incongruency
I am highlighting this sections specifically, because we are arriving at the main strategic point of the article. A point that is so misunderstood and wrongly used, that is making experienced Players pull their hair when they see it.
The point I am referring to is this: “Use the information that you are getting via filters“.
When you apply a filter or a screening question, her response speaks volumes. Don’t pretend you didn’t notice or you don’t think it is enough. Let’s explain this with an example. You just met a girl in a bar, and after greetings, you tease her and she laughs. Then you tease her again and she laughs more. Then you light kino her upper arm with a rapport statement, and she becomes engaged and interested.
How the hell did you know to pivot into kino + rapport? Well, your teasing was filter in itself. Why in the world would she be laughing if she is not interested/finds you interesting. She passed the filter once, she passed it twice, then you introduce kino and rapport as the next filter. That is how you know to introduce it in the first place. Can you imagine the stupidity if the Players mind were to go “she is laughing to what I say… but this doesn’t mean anything!“.
Same is true for proactive screening. The date has been going bluntly or boringly, so you decide it is the moment to figure out where you stand, or cut your losses and call it a day. Hence, you decide for a strong, bold escalation statement, for example, you say “let’s sit next to each other”, and then you go for the hug. If she rejects, she rejects; if not, you are on the money. Sounds different, but it is the same idea as before, used proactively. If she passes the test, then you and she are the couple who is already hugging, don’t go backwards on your speaking manner and frame push, she already passed the test!
Probabilities and statistics
There is always a risk of things backfiring. Especially when screening, it is more than likely that the girl is aware what’s up. They rarely will give false answers when you are checking her interest level. And if they intentionally do, it is a big red flag on her inner personality.
The flip side of this risk is that it can backfire. If she fails to pass the filter/screening question, both you and she know she didn’t pass, and hence, a behavioural change to your attitude against her has to happen. You need to punish bad behaviour with aloofness and coldness. Then later you can try to rebuild the bridge, but at least temporarily, you have to react to it.
Therefore, a test like that is a probabilistic tool. Some times it will work in your favour, sometimes it will not. But this raises a question: why play your chances when you can take the path of least risk?
And now we arrive at the strategic function of risk. The fact that it is symmetrical. Once both adversaries agree on a coinflip, the probabilities are fixed on that flip and not on other flips. Let’s give an example: you and me want to settle a dispute. We can fight it out, where I have 60% chance to win, and you have 40% chance to win. A friend comes along, and proposes instead to settle it in a game of coinflips (each player has 50% of winning), whoever wins gives 50$ to the loser, and the dispute is over.
Either the fight or the coinflip represents risk; however, from your perspective, the coinflip is better because you have a higher chance to win. From my viewpoint, maybe the coinflip is also better, because it avoids the risk of long-term harm, hence I might be willing to forfeit the 10% advantage I have over a fistfight. Therefore, we might agree to settle the dispute like that.
The abstract version of this example goes like this: when you are considering a filter or a screening action, you have a probability of success X. If you do nothing, your long-term probability is Y. The only thing that matters is whether X or Y is higher. Once you make a decision, be consistent with your decision and stick to it.
The whole point is that risk is always symmetric and it equalizes other advantages. If you have agency of choice to take the 50/50 coinflip over the 40/60 fistfight, then I will be locked into your decision. In Seduction, we as men have the benefit of agency, hence we get to decide which risks to take. The point is to be aware of our decisions and choose the beneficial ones.
Thesaurus of Seduction BS
Let’s now take a moment and address some of the BS thrown around in the seduction community. We have both the vocabulary and the theory to back up our conclusions.
In Indirect Game, Players have higher closing ratios
Nope. You are making a word play between filtering and screening. In direct Game we apply a filter by giving the statement of intent early. In indirect Game, the filter is only social (will she exchange words with you), then the Player engages sexually with girls only after screening them.
Hence, you are masking the rejection over a weaker filter and a stronger screening process. It is a wordplay, not efficiency. The only advantage indirect Game has over direct is the timeframe to implement tools like pre-section and social proof. But this comes at a setup and time cost.
In direct Daygame, you are giving your value away by complimenting her
Again, nope. Don’t confuse filter with value calculations. Maybe the act itself is slightly pedestalizing, but thinking like this is missing the point.
Among the girls who are available to you to lay via Daygame, losing some of your value in the compliment is irrelevant (I would argue you don’t even lose value if done right). The opener is the first big filter, and among the girls who pass this filter, you have value to spare either way. From among the girls who don’t pass the filter, we don’t care! They will likely never bang you to begin with!
Time is on your side, you can always take it slow
No, she controls the speed of seduction as well. She does so via how she passes your screening and filtering questions. If she showcases excessive interest in those, you need to match her.
If you don’t, it will introduce incongruency based on the discussion we had before. Many a time, going faster is better than slow. And many a time, you are on an invisible timer.
This essay explores one aspect of a larger structure. On its own, it stands, but it is not the whole model.
The book connects these pieces into a single structure: frame, value, power, escalation, calibration — not as advice, but as a theory of how the Game actually works.
If you want the complete system rather than individual essays, start here:
This article is a spiritual continuation of the earlier digression on Mindfulness and the role of the brain shaping reality itself. This time, we will focus on the practical application of emotions detection. We will do so by investigating Paul Ekman and his research on this topic. Well, then… take it away!
Introduction
We are posing a question, in order to regulate emotions, achieve emotional control, and much more importantly, use this knowledge for any benefit infield, we need to ask: what are emotions, and where do they come from? Because there exists no emotion without a cause, and when the discussion starts from the emotions and expands outwards (I feel X, therefore Y…), it is doomed to miss the point. There is always a Z before: Event Z cause feeling X, therefore Y…
Emotions, at the bare minimum of their definition, are internal interpreters of external states of the world. When you stand at the edge of a cliff, your hands start sweating, and you call this fear. Then it is not the fear that warns you that standing there is dangerous; instead, it is the essence of the situation – that it is dangerous – that is causing the fear, which you understand emotionally.
Proving this, that emotions are a hidden language of the unconscious part of the brain, is not hard, as you saw. Explaining the root cause of this language is a bit more complicated. Because the root cause where we will be able to interpret that language, and hence make practical use of it. I will present two theories that have been used in various ways by the seduction community and provide my own thoughts and commentary.
Paul Ekman – Innate emotions
There is a case to be made that emotions have to serve some evolutionary purpose. They are a product of successive generations, no different than your height or eye color is. And in no different way than hunger aims to make you find food, so emotions are there to help you survive in the social battlefield of Homo Sapiens.
Take this theory to its natural conclusion, and you will end up with the following observations:
Emotions should have consistent building blocks. Not unlike taste has 5 basic receptors. This will be the response signals that the body is reacting to.
These basic emotions should be in every human and every culture. Hence, be universal. This is what it means to be hardwired and innate.
These basic emotions, since they are universal, should have a bodily expression that is again universally present. Not unlike a hiccup or yawning have their functions.
Hence, starting from this viewpoint, that emotions are hardwired and evolved like any other trait; we have a baseline to what to look for.
The basic emotions
This is where Paul Ekman comes in. The consensus from the outcome of his research is that there are 7 basic emotions, and every other emotion is a combination of these:
Happiness
Contempt
Sadness
Anger
Surprise
Disgust
Fear
Each of these emotions has a specific purpose of existence, and it is a response to something external. Hence, solidifying their hardwired nature. In particular:
Take a moment to study this chart, because the way the emotions are expressed, are related to their triggers. For example anger causes you to frown, in order to focus the eyes on the threat (the cause of anger). Fear makes your eyes wide open, in order to be able to absorb more information from your surroundings, etc.
Universality of Expression
The second point of this excursion is that emotions are universal. That means every human being is going to exhibit them in the same way. Hmm… let’s think about that last part.
Emotions are not something within our control; they are externally induced – that is what the theory implies. If you stand next to a hungry lion, all humans will feel fear, and that fear is going to be expressed in the face, in the same way for all. We have a window to the hidden language of the soul.
If you learn how to read these emotions from their so-called facial expressions or micro-expressions, then you will know what the other person is feeling (i.e., his true interpretation of the situation), despite what he is saying, he thinks or think he feels. Well, what should we look for then?
The main areas of focus are eyebrows, eyes, lips, and cheeks. The upper portion of the face (eyebrows, eyelids and checks) has to do with directing attention for the eyes, not unlike how a cat’s ears are going to move to the direction of the sound. Opening the eyes more means absorb more information, while frowning or squeezing means focusing attention. The lower part, mouth, lips and its surroundings has to do with either showing teeth (universal sign of aggression in the animal kingdom), or priming you to scream, shout, or make other relevant sounds (for example think of a girl’s scream in response to danger that aims to draw attention to her). I will provide a full summary below:
Most of these emotions flash on people’s faces for milliseconds. Therefore, the window to the soul is very short. It requires some training and practice to quickly catch flickering emotions. I believe there are training tools from Ekman exactly for this. A micro-expression is flashed of 0.2 to half a second, then you are asked what you saw.
There you have it, this is the practical Game application, determining the state of the girl from her facial expressions. It will not make her like you more or anything, but at least it will let you know if she already likes you. If you say something that you thought should make her smile, but she flashes an anger face, you should micro-calibrate and change topics.
This can be especially useful in social forms of Game, eg, nightgame and social circle, where the Player needs to balance multiple conflicting interests between the members. Additionally, social games will make people act against their true intentions. Hence, true emotional detection can yield dividends.
The easiest way to begin with this, is to study the diagram I provided above, the photographs linked form Ekman, and then try to detect emotions in real life. Don’t sweat over it, begin with simple and easy emotions to catch (the more intense the feeling in the person, the more pronounce will be its facial expression), and then work your way from there. In theatre specifically, actors are trained to exaggerate facial emotions, so that is a good source of intel as well. I would urge to do this outside of your normal approach sessions, because those are already overload it with other variables. Implement emotional detection only when you have mastered it and it comes as second nature.
Against Paul Ekman
Now that I have presented his theory in full, it is time to critique it. Albeit marginally useful in practice, this is not a theory I personally advocate. In the next entry of this series, I will discuss the constructed theory of emotion, something that I believe is a more sound interpretation.
Criticism against Paul Ekman is multifold, so let us see some of it.
Methodology
Ekman’s theory is essentially voted by consensus. Ekman ran around the world, asked people, “Does this look like happiness?” and if enough people agreed, he distilled his core facial expressions of happiness. Rinse and repeat for the other emotions as well.
This is something that sounds plausible, but it is as reliable as asking people with a questionnaire about their sexual lives and the causes of attraction. It can work, you might be collecting garbage data.
Universality
Much of the so-called universality of emotions stems from the fact that all cultures shown a picture of happiness, agreed that this looks like happiness. In particular, hunter-gatherers around the world agreed, which made a strong case that the emotion has evolved and is hardwired. Nothing wrong with this, this is how most of sociological theory is generated (that is why I feel the whole field is trash), but at least you would expect maturity on his data gathering process…
Actual accounts of his field reports when he was in contact with primitives would suggest very unethical behaviour in testing his hypothesis. He was forcing answers based on yes/no questions that were heavily biased. This is not even hidden, this is from his actual papers and journal entries.
Emotional intelligence
Many of the so-called EQ tests (the emotional equivalent of IQ) around the world test specifically his theory. They provided images of certain basic emotions and ask participants which emotion they saw. The more emotions people can detect, the higher their EQ.
For example…
Albeit sound in theory, I believe this practice is at best retarded, because it beats the purpose. On one hand, Ekman came up with his emotions by asking people “Is this emotion X” and taking consensus votes. On the other hand, when he presents his theory as a universal EQ test, the scores are quite bad. So what gives?
The useful part of his theory
There can be some debate whether this theory is correct and how much useful it is for Game, however, there is one aspect that should be mentioned. It is not about the emotions themselves or their expression, it is about the way we create hypotheses in lie detection.
The official version from Ekman says: if there is a contradiction between verbals and facial expressions, then facial expression is the truth. The verbals get trumped, so the person lies.
Now gauge that person’s reaction. Was she happier when she received the free money? If not, for example, she became startled or even felt guilty about it, then… this is not a lie, but hold that thought! That is a window to her inner character.
Her reaction is what it is, so you need to ask: why would she not be happy about getting the free money? New hypothesis based on this intel and we are already one step closer at profiling her character. For example, we now know for sure she is not a person that likes to take advantage of others, or receive undeserved rewards
Whatever your new hypothesis on her personality, this is an informed step forward; this is the key to advanced empathy!
In the next entry of this series, we will explore the constructed theory of emotion, an alternative to Ekman, that considers emotions as a fabrication of the brain.
This essay explores one aspect of a larger structure. On its own, it stands, but it is not the whole model.
The book connects these pieces into a single structure: frame, value, power, escalation, calibration — not as advice, but as a theory of how the Game actually works.
If you want the complete system rather than individual essays, start here:
The Sexual Market Place is a parable. It is meant to represent a model and a model only. A predictive and useful model that nails the task of implanting the basics of Red Pill into the student. Its usefulness ends there. Because the SMP is not a tool for self-actualization. Excelling at the “market” is not your purpose in life. Cascades from this idea lead to all sorts of perversions and discussions on Game and Value that ultimately miss the point.
What is your purpose in life and Game
Are you in Game to bang girls? Are you in Game for the hedonistic purpose of sticking your dick into women?
Have you ever had pointless sex to understand the emptiness of sex just for sex? Using the girl as a masturbation machine to be forgotten the next day? It is not worth it like that; this is alleviating the symptom, not the cause. At the end of the day, paying a whore will always be effort positive towards you. Even at advanced stages of Game, if Game were to be just a “job” to “buy” sex, then I guarantee you, working overtime on your normal job and hiring an escort instead is the play.
So, the point is not about the sex. Well, let me tell you it is not about women either. Have you seen animals in the zoo, bears do this and monkeys do this: they make bored, silly faces, all life sucked out of them… and they masturbate. Masturbation symbolizing the emptiness of their existence. They never do this in nature… maybe, have they been hyper-sexualized?
Do you see my point now? When you think of women and think of adventure, companionship, and connection – depending on which angle you observe the thought – you are missing the point. You find this adventure, companionship, and connection in them only because you have no other way to find those.
Do you have any friends? True male friends to bond over the hunt and campfire like your ancestors did? Can you roam into the forest and be truly free, do whatever you like, explore however you like, let your curiosity run wild? Of course you can’t; that’s why you are regressing to seeking that in women.
Don’t get me wrong, in the modern world, you don’t have any alternatives. All space is owned by some state or another, and they will force you to submit to their petty and arbitrary rules. The times when you could enforce your own justice based on the strength of your ability and might are long gone now. Same is true of your connections. Respect is a concept long gone. Because respect for another man comes from a shared understanding ofgood and beauty. But no such thing is possible in the cult of identity. Uniqueness for the sake of uniqueness. Brokenness and incoherence everywhere that makes the man weak. Even if you could find your so-called “true friends”, you would be too weak to achieve much of anything.
The hunting part of courtship is the only space that is relatively unmoderated. This with an asterisk. On one hand, courtship that is primarily regulated by hormones has to be free. Because the hormones themselves bow to no rules. The wildness of the female spirit and sexuality, is still that, unregulated wildness. On the other hand, the social programming of the last 60 years has invaded exactly that free and wild space. It invokes petty rules and boundaries even in the realm of courtship. That is the one true reason many of us find satisfaction in more feminine cultures, with so-called traditional gender roles. These are just cultures where the female spirit hasn’t been constrained.
But understand this: satisfaction in Game comes from the adventure. It doesn’t come from the fucking. It is you, your skills, and the wildness of the social battlefield. You are on a raid to conquer. The loot is just that… the cherry on top. The adventure itself is your true purpose.
I strongly disagree that replication is our purpose in life, taking precedence over many other functions. I believe copulation and the generation of new life in humans is an instinct that only kicks in after a sufficient level of self-actualization. At the basic level, think the fate of the mantis, where he is being beheaded from the female while he is sticking his dick into her. Do you not feel the aversion to this fate? Do you not feel the aversion of your life purpose being reduced to a shoot of sperm, carrying half of your genetic composition? On the non-basic level, think of the fate of the depressed millionaire. Spending his days on his dark head, with life having no meaning – that is success with no meaning. Is popping a kid into a woman the thing that will give him purpose in life? Are you mad?
There is a higher force and a higher satisfaction that comes from a successful seduction. It is not mechanics, and it is not gene propagation only. It is the act of achievement, the use of skillset, the creation of something out of nothing. There is a bottom version of seduction – the fucking. There is a higher and noble version of it – the art. That is why picking up a slut from the dance floor at 4am feels empty, that is why fucking a whore feels empty.
The Sexual Market Place
Sufficient iterations of Game and intersexual theory have gone to incredible depths. Knowledge of male and female psychology has never been understood better than to this day. The SMP, however, with all its genius, is just a perversion of the concepts. Because the SMP is meant to signify a signpost, a scientific and predictive tool, not a thing in itself. It doesn’t exist as a fixed structure; it only exists on the first level of abstraction – not a true representation, instead, a low-resolution image.
So what is the issue with the SMP? By acknowledging its existence, you have given yourself a new set of rules and boundaries to trap you. The point of Game is the conquering. You have your skillset, and you need to apply it to make something out of nothing. You are not a point in the SMP graph; you are a range of points, all conditional on how you use your social skills in the short to medium term. There is no fair exchange, there is only “risk assessment” to where your skills can take you. The SMP is guidelines, what is good and what is bad, but under no circumstances should it be viewed as an absolutist list of prices, what X in male value can buy Y in female value. Because your X doesn’t exist, as a man, you make that X. Static value is only for women, that is the curse of looks. And you should be thankful for it, because static value implies no agency.
All this leads to my next point. The issues that spring from taking the SMP too literally. That is the Online Game type of guy: Looksmaxx, get your finances in order and get your value sky-high. Then girls will pick you, bro! Putting effort is for Betas! Does that sound fun to you? Did you already forget the purpose of Game we discussed above? By acknowledging that mindframe, you already forfeited the challenge of the adventure for the perversion that is lack of agency. You do X and optimize Y, then you expect the teacher to come to you, say “Good boy”, and give you a girl to pork. It is fundamentally a weak and reactive position. And it will stay like this, regardless of you tapping a girl here or a girl there. You are the depressed millionaire in search for meaning.
That exactly is the difference that gives meaning or not. Expecting to chart your own path vs waiting someone to praise you for excelling at something. From the former, SMP is a navigating tool; from the latter, SMP is a prison no different than the one you had before. The SMP doesn’t have a predetermined slot with your name on it. You force yourself into the SMP, and you make that slot for you. And you only occupy that slot in the moment and in context, not universally. That is only the correct way of understanding it, and by extension, understanding Red Pill in general.
This essay explores one aspect of a larger structure. On its own, it stands, but it is not the whole model.
The book connects these pieces into a single structure: frame, value, power, escalation, calibration — not as advice, but as a theory of how the Game actually works.
If you want the complete system rather than individual essays, start here:
Crazy idea to bring mindfulness to this blog. I don’t personally advocate or actively practice it, but some fundamental concepts are particularly important for Game and we will cover them. Before anything, let’s put everything in order.
Basic Summary
Mindfulness is the practice of bringing your focus on what is called “here and now”, the present moment. Take a moment… breathe… pause and focus on your toes of your legs, move them around… maybe now focus on the feeling of the air in your skin… you can feel it, warm and soft right? Focus on the sounds and the images around you… turn off your brain and just observe. This is the “here and now” – the present moment.
By doing this, assuming you sufficiently turned off your brain from its logical functions, you should feel the world much more vibrant, you should have felt more alive, and with excitement building up inside of you. Crazy right? There are two directions to understand the concept, one stemming from Eastern mysticism with a focus on meditation and the other from a neuroscientific perspective. You can already guess the direction we will take, so strap on for the latter.
The basic idea comes from brain functions. Brain itself is a very recent invention of evolution, and even more so is the ability to use logic (the voice in your head), and even, even more so, is the ability to maintain memory and future projection. The running narrative is that humans are the only animals that can “remember” and “think ahead”; in contrast, all of what we call skill and learning in other animals is akin to Pavlovian response, just hardwired behaviour.
You protest… how is that even possible to be arrogant like this? Well… let’s understand this from an even more basic concept: the concept of theory of mind. For a behaviour to be non-Pavlovian, it has to be able to independently respond to signals. You ring the bell, then there is a processing moment, then the dog decides to salivate or not, depending on whether you gonna bring food to it. That would be the non-Pavlovian version, correct?
For this to happen, the subject (the dog) should be able to understand the setting, think from your perspective (i.e., whether you intend to bring it food or not), and then decide to make the connection that bell implies food is suitable or not for this occasion. If the subject decides to think only from its perspective (“what I think is correct” – without second-guessing), disregarding the rest of the signals, then the pre-established response “bell → food” would automatically dominate all alternatives. Precisely this distinction – perspective shift – makes the difference between a sovereign skill (choose how and when to use it) and a scheduling or input/output task, not unlike how a computer operates. Therefore, for a skill to not be hardwired, theory of mind is a prerequisite.
Ok, we have something measurable now… which animals display theory of mind? Which animals can think from different perspectives? This is limited to only some apes, primates, and dogs. To understand this, think of the following experiment: point with your finger at a toy; if you are with a cat, the cat will just stare at your finger, failing to understand what pointing means. If you are with a dog, the dog will understand that pointing means not the finger itself, but to redirect attention to the direction of the finger, the finger leads to the toy! This is the difference between theory of mind and not.
All well and good so far, but our original objective was to arrive at the concept of past and future. Well, past and future can only exist if there is theory of mind, otherwise, there is no use for the function, it might as well be hardwired. The whole point of past and future is to make an action sovereign, to give nuance to it. Hence, their existence only makes sense if they are practical, and they can only be practical with presence of theory of mind.
However, let us investigate the current literature in memory. Because the concept of memory is not a simple mental replaying of events, it is an active reconstruction of the scene based on limited information. It is not a movie, it is an active process, and a very inconsistent one at that. Time and time again, the malleability of human memory and its own self-falsification is observed. Even when people were 100% convinced of certain facts based on their memory, the reality proved to be quite different. This has been documented in trials and courts, with victims being convinced that the perpetrator was a totally innocent person. Therefore, not only theory of mind is a prerequisite for the usefulness of “memory”, but memory itself is the same as future projection: they are the same mental system. The past and the future are both just a fleeting reconstruction of events in the brain, and in the brain only.
Therefore… what is happening with past, present and future? From our prior discussion, past and future are mental simulations… but does the present exist, or is it also a brain trick? Well… it doesn’t either. The present moment cannot exist as a thing in itself due to the nature of the sense organs: vision, hearing, touch, etc. The sensor, for example, the eyes, has to collect the signal and send it into brain, then the brain has to process the signal into an image. But signal collection operates at different speeds and at different stages of processing. Vision is collected faster than sound (because light travels faster than sound), but has to go through a more complicated path in the brain before it ends up as a mental image. Sound is collected slower, but actually processed faster. Therefore, when you sit opposite to your friend and you watch him speak, the “image part” is collected and processed at different speeds than the “sound” part. But you don’t experience your friend with sound delay, the “image” and “sound” parts are synced…. because the brain is playing tricks on you!
What you experience as “here and now” is actually “just a moment in the past”, the brain collected all the signals, processed them, and synced them together. Fundamentally, you cannot experience the “now” as now; when you experience it, it has already passed a moment ago.
Hierarchies in the brain
Hmm… past/future is a scam… and nowis also a scam… so what gives? Well, they are both brain simulations, but they use different systems in the brain. The past/future system is much more recent and hence primitive in its function. Evolution just didn’t experiment enough on it to perfect it. The here and now system, on the other hand, is shared with the majority of the animal kingdom and is quite efficient and effective at its job. This is why you can turn off the voice in your head and still function. However, for our purposes, we will focus on a specific difference between the two systems.
Dopamine
The brain uses neurochemicals to interpret the world, as has been mentioned multiple times in this blog, what we call happiness is a mix of:
Oxytocin
Dopamine
Endorphins
Serotonin
Unusual release of those chemicals leads to various feelings of happiness, while withdrawal leads to the opposite. In particular, the brain itself becomes accustomed to certain states, for example, if there are 5 units of dopamine constantly released, then the brain will consider this as the new normal, requiring 6 units to detect a difference and translate it as “excitement” (note: the same is true with the other chemicals, not unique to dopamine). The kicker is… that the past/future system only responds to dopamine; it simply doesn’t register the other chemicals [The Molecule of More – Lieberman and Long].
The big happiness shift you feel when you switch to here and now is the perception of the other chemicals in your brain’s thought process and functions. That is why you feel more connected to the world when practicing mindfulness… the effect of oxytocin! Oxytocin is also responsible for the feeling of satisfaction and contentment. Dopamine, on the other hand, is responsible for feelings of excitement, but lacks satisfaction or payoff at the end of it. There is a famous experiment: Scientists hooked up electrodes into a rats brain and connected them to a button. If the rat would press the button it would excite his dopamine centers, leading to the rush/excitement feeling. What happened was that once the rat discovered the mechanism, he became incredibly restless. He would maniacally press the button forgoing food and sleep, eventually leading to his death.
This is the curse of not living in the now; you forfeit your right to oxytocin and the feeling of “enough, I am happy now”. You maniacally chase and chase with no end! You cannot find happiness in your head! You can only find it in the now. If you still don’t believe me, take it from ancient worms [A brief history of intelligence – Bennet]. Primitive creatures that have survived to this day and age, and their functions have been studied by scientists in relation to dopamine/oxytocin. The worms have only one receptor to detect the concentration of food in their environment, not unlike how smell functions for humans. The worms operate on two axes:
Worm is hungry: excrete dopamine → initiate action, move towards food.
There is no simpler way to showcase the interplay of dopamine/oxytocin than this. Stick in your head, stick with dopamine, and you operate only in the first mode.
How to do this
Well, we made a case for the here and now. How do we use it in practice? There is no science to it, you just need to train your mind to calm down and focus on stuff positive to now and contrary to past/future. That is where all the advice boils down to. Here are some examples:
Turn of your logical brain, think nothing at all for a minute or two.
Slow your movements, focus on the feelings of your body.
If need, start small, start on your breath or focus on your fingers and tows. Try to move the attention upwards.
Focus on your surroundings, the feelings and the sounds of people, this will activate oxytocin and take you to present.
Remember, girls are naturally averse to logic, or better put, naturally focused on oxytocin and serotonin. This helps them bond, i.e., understand the social game better, and to later extend care and tend for babies. Especially in Daygame, it is too much to ask them to enter our Male default state (logic), so we enter theirs. It is to our benefit as well, oxytocin naturally speeds up connection, and serotonin naturally establishes power structures (via status), i.e., humor! When coaches advocate to get out of your head, it is precisely for these reasons!
This post is blowing up in size and scope. Stay tuned for part two, where I will analyse the prominent theories on the origins of emotions and their connection to the groundwork established here.
This essay explores one aspect of a larger structure. On its own, it stands, but it is not the whole model.
The book connects these pieces into a single structure: frame, value, power, escalation, calibration — not as advice, but as a theory of how the Game actually works.
If you want the complete system rather than individual essays, start here:
There is much discussion on standards, quality, and so-called style. You need to get girls, but only get girls that are smoking hot, educated (at least be able to recite Homer by heart), and do this while she is begging for it!
Well, practitioners of Game are very likely to find the reality of things quite different out there. They are going to find that rejection is ten-a-penny, style is a fiction, and educated girls are more rare than unicorns (albeit, they do exist). The point I am trying to make, if you can’t lay 6s, then you have no business with 9s. The fuck ladder is real, drop your standards, especially when learning, and aim for the girls that you realistically have a chance.
We will now explore the bottom world of Game, because the “I approached 100 girls to lay a 6” is a reality most of us have to face in our learning career. The general rule is that we first break the quantity ceiling, then we break the quality ceiling. Therefore, indulge shamelessly in what you can get, and focus on getting it consistently, then later focus on improving it.
The myth of quality
There is a long discussion on what is realistically achievable in Game. I am not the best person to consult, as my entire sexual history started with Daygame, barring a few drunken one-night stands; all my lays come post Game. Other, more well-rounded individuals have stronger opinions, which I summarise below:
Krauser: ceiling is 2 points hotter from the second hottest girl you layed pre-Game.
I tend to agree with these empirically; it is long known that Daygame aims at 6s, 7s, and 8s, with 9s being rare exceptions (personally, I can only claim I had two 9s in my career, but what I would call a nine is really strict). Regardless, here I have summarised the ranking scale, so refer to that to put context into the numbers.
However, male autism with numbers aside, I believe this discussion is missing the point. The ranking part makes sense only to benchmark against other Gamers (dick size competition), or to measure your own progress. When it comes to actually getting a lay, the priority should be finding a girl to lay, and then everything else comes second. Public orations aside, no Daygamer would actually pass a lay with a 6, just because she is a 6. He would gladly indulge in it, and bragging rights aside… not fill much differently than laying a 7 (okay, with 8s and above, there is a qualitative difference, I have to admit).
Therefore, based on me, your benchmarking is a function of your past results and the time since your last lay. If you have had no results, or no results in a long time, go and solve that part first before you start seeking 10s again. At the end of the day, every girl comes with an expiration date on how long she will amuse you, but at least the first time is always a thrill. Take it from Heartiste: “You will get bored of sex with every girl you date/love/marry. The only question is how soon”.
The myth of style
Worse and equally prominent on public discourse is the discussion on style, i.e., there is a “right” (read “Alpha”) way to get the girl, then every other way to get the girl is invalid, a cheat, or at extremes… unethical.
Unless you are really sensitive to social criticism (which is a big issue in and of itself), learn to disengage from such discussions. Nature has blessed the damsels with copious amounts of solipsism, so in her head, there is only one way to seduce her… her way! The only question is how much you are willing to engage with her way.
When a Daygamer brags that he finished his first date lay with the price tag of a coffee cup and a taxi ride, it doesn’t mean he used some juju magic to make the girl abandon her dreams for vacation in Dubai. It means for that specific girl, getting seduced over a coffee date was within her realistic realm of possibilities. Thankfully, those girls exist in vast amounts, and that is what makes the frugal strategy of Daygame work… over the strategy of shipping them to Dubai. However, there are also girls who will only accept the latter and will never be open to be Daygamed.
Therefore, if the point above can be so painfully clear, why do people get confused when the same interaction plays out on other axis:
The speed of the seduction.
How gentlemanly you have to behave.
How much of the conversation you have to carry.
How many PDAs she will accept.
All these are what constitute “style”, do you see the pointlessness now? The only thing that matters is whether you can get her into bed; it is about calibrating to the girl, i.e., playing it her way. All the axes that are not actively harmful to you are indeed part of Game, they are up for negotiation. I have already written in depth about this here. There is no “style”, there is only calibration to the girl.
So what is non-negotiable?
Let us debunk some more myths. What is non-negotiable and why? For example, Game itself asks you to repurpose your entire personality, so why later on maintaining frame and your ID becomes non-negotiable? Same goes for money; getting away cheap has bragging rights, but why do we actively push for it? Men (Betas) have shown pretty clearly that they are happy to spend money on girls.
As hinted above, the only non-negotiable aspects of Game are precisely these: changing too much of your personality for her, and how much money you spend on her. People can delve into trivialities on how the contrary is pedestalizing, but these are just that, trivialities; the core reasons are more fundamental.
Splitting the bill
First comes spending. Well, the coffee date is convenient and fast, but the true goal is to reduce seduction into one axis: charismatic value. When you split the bill half-half, she has only one reason to stay at the date: because she fancies you. Therefore, her feedback becomes true; every smile, escalation, or other little signal she sends is true. Sounds silly spelled like this, but for people who have observed Social Game, will quickly understand that in that setting, many of the smiles, kino, or flattery are fake and part of the grander game of social chess. Girls will act one way but mean something totally different. She might be flirty all evening and give you the harshest of blowouts later. Do you now see the superpower of completely skipping this superficial layer?
Building on top of this (albeit still part of calibration), is the ability to process feedback. When she only judges your worth on charismatic value, and her face drops, you know where you messed up. The feedback is up personal and to the point. She will not act nice to tap on your social power, or because she enjoys your party, she will act nice because she wants to act nice, because she finds you interesting. More than anything, this is why I advocate for always splitting the bill half and half, no matter the situation.
ID and character
Your character will always be a filter. For you to be something, you must forfeit your right to be something else. It has long been documented that girls truly have types, and they have types beyond appearance; they have types based on archetype. Her associating with a certain archetype of man will feed her own self-image and hence something structural that will always exist: she cannot be a rocker if she doesn’t fuck the edgy rockstar, plain and simple. Read the prior essay to understand how girls self-define through association rather than self-generation of values.
Therefore, when Game asks to rebuild your identity, it asks you to do so as a means to an end. When you have rebuilt yourself enough to consistently get results, further molding of ID should happen from self-generation. It will be a massive filter, but it will be a strong hook for the girls who pass that filter. It will be a strong hook for you as well, as it will lead to more honest interactions and relationships. Maintaining a positive self-image is a non-negotiable prerequisite of self-acceptance. Therefore, once you find it after the beginner stage, revel in it; this is you, make your core rock solid!
Conclusion
Game is already hard enough, don’t make it even harder by chasing social ideals and expectations. I would even say that Daygame specifically, requires you to step outside of the clutches of the good society, to become a rebel in your own way.
Well, in that world, there is no shame. Focus on acquiring the skillset and let the results speak for themselves when the time comes. If you are getting 6s when you were getting nothing, that is winning. When you were getting 7s when you were getting 6s before, that is also winning. Let the people demanding perfection try to live up to their ideals first; they won’t. As you should be well aware by now, the Sexual Market Place doesn’t lie: high quality women only mate with high quality men. And to be and maintain high value requires tremendous effort. The guy who lays 10s every week should have an equally deep system for it, otherwise he is just a bullshitter. The only thing that truly matters is what you were getting before vs what you are getting now, focus only on that!
This essay explores one aspect of a larger structure. On its own, it stands, but it is not the whole model.
The book connects these pieces into a single structure: frame, value, power, escalation, calibration — not as advice, but as a theory of how the Game actually works.
If you want the complete system rather than individual essays, start here:
